It's My Dog's World: I Just Live In It

Dear Peter Berg....

1. Thanks for directing Hancock.
2. Thanks for the tone, which I would describe as "mythic frat boy."  However?  One less butt joke wouldn't have hurt the movie at all.
3. Thanks for casting Will Smith, and making him NOT use that killer smile, which made us all the hungrier for it.   (Did you know his wife Jada Pinkett-Smith help dog whisperer Cesar Millan get his start?)
4. Thanks for casting dog-loving Charlize Theron, letting her be byoooootiful, and allowing her to kick the emotional ass we all know she can.(Did you know she's a member of PETA?)
5. It goes without saying, thanks for casting my imaginary boyfriend Mr. Jason Bateman, who manages in this movie to make behaving like a reasonable adult very, very sexy.  (Let's see--did you see him in Dodgeball, A True Underdog Story?)
6. So...now that I have thanked you, will you please stop shaking the camera?  I know you're a Real Filmmaker.  You made the brilliant Friday Night Lights, and the shaky-cam made total sense in the film AND the TV show.  This movie, not so much.

But y'all...please go see it.  It's raggedy--but it's really something.

Why Eli Stone is My Newest Imaginary Boyfriend

Dag. I so wanted to resist this show because I'm suffering from Magic Realism Fatigue. And a boy Ally McBeal did not appeal to me.

But. Victor Garber can take a single word ('crush') and force me to replay it five times.

But. My dad was a charming (eventually recovering) alcoholic who died too young of a brain tumor. And oh, creator Greg Berlanti, you have caught the devastating pull of an erratic parent.

But. Jonny Lee Miller. Brother love. Crazy musical numbers with GEORGE MICHAEL. Debates about abstinence only sex ed and gay chimps. Great, great, great. What's flawed is flawed, but what's great is addictive.

Yet Another Reason Why Stephen Colbert Just Rules...

Because a single sentence can raise almost 60,000 bucks for needy schools.

Patton Oswalt says...

"I want peace.  I just want peace that smells like soap."

I Heart John McEnroe

Hard to believe, but John McEnroe has become my New Imaginary Boyfriend...for this.  Special thanks to Elaine for featuring it on her very animal friendly blog.

Imaginary boyfriend of the day: W.H. Auden

Because he said:

"The definition of prayer is paying careful and concentrated
attention to something other than your own constructions."

Why I Love David Milch

• Because he cast Ian McShane in “Deadwood” and let him do his devilish best.
  
• Because he put Ed O’Neill AND Bruce Greenwood in his new show about surfing (and Luis! Guzman!).
  
• And because when an interviewer asked him if thought “Deadwood” was his best work, Milch explained he tried to stay away from being proud of his work because “Given my character defects, I start with pride, and I end up under a bridge with three strangers.”

Now I Am Falling in Love with Ze Frank

Another Internet sensation who likes to make his cat do tricks, but especially because of resolutions like this: resolutions_06.

I promise not to keep ideas in my head, unfulfilled and full of promise - not to let these vague outlines of future actions give me false confidence and security in the abstract.  Instead I will execute them quickly and faithfully so that I am again on the brink of the unknown, hoping that these ideas were not the last that would ever come to me from God knows where.

And this:

I promise not to feel embarrassed that I sometimes wear commercially available “clothing shields” in my armpits to avoid sweat stains.

      

I promise to remind myself that “clothing shields” are far more comfortable than using toilet paper and scotch tape.

      

I promise to remind myself that “clothing shields” should not be used as mini-diapers for cats no matter how funny they might look.

Hm. Maybe this is the Month of Imaginary Boyfriends.  Or the bi-week.  If Jonathan Coulton and Ze Frank had a baby, it would have brains spilling out of its head.

I have fallen in love with Jonathan Coulton

VTAW: Dance, Soterios Johnson, Dance, originally uploaded by jawboneradio.

An Internet music sensation....please make this a musical, Mr. Coulton!

Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock, Together Again

If you were a girl nerd of a certain age, there was really only one existential question:

Who did you have a crush on, Captain Kirk or Mr. Spock?

Mr. Spock has been taking pictures of naked fat women, and challenging body image ideals.. 

And Captain Kirk has now been given the full Warhol in a Canadian gallery show that asks various artists to explore new worlds...of his profile.

I know who I'd pick...Live long and prosper!